Girl Meets Jealousy
by callmecottoncandyface
Summary: In which Riley finally discovers her feelings for Farkle.
1. Chapter 1

The first time the jealousy hit was when I saw the two leaning in for a kiss in the hallway. I walked out of my father's classroom (because, of course, he followed us to high school) and noticed Farkle at his locker. His slim body leaning up against it, his long brown hair sticking up at all angles. 'Like I just rolled out of bed' he would say. I rolled my eyes at the thought. I saw Smackle come up behind him, surprising him. He turned to look at her. They exchanged words and then I saw him start to lean down.

I physically froze. I couldn't breathe. It felt like I was being run over by a truck. I could only stare at the kissing couple. I could feel a presence right beside me, but I couldn't glance over. I couldn't.

"Riles? Riley, are you okay?" My best friend's voice floated to my ears. But I still couldn't move. In my periphery, I saw Maya turn to see what I was staring at. When she saw the couple, she let out a small "oh" and grabbed my arm.

"Come on, honey. We're going to have a little chat." I was telling my brain to make my body move, but it wouldn't respond. I heard Maya sigh to the left of me. "Hey, Huckleberry! I need your help here."

I felt two strong (not very 9th grade like) arms wrap around my waist. Lucas flung me over his shoulder and started to carry me in the opposite direction of where Farkle and Smackle were.

"Bay window?" he asked.

"Bay window," Maya responded.


	2. Chapter 2

When we reached my house, Lucas plopped me down on to the bay window. He turns to look at Maya with an exasperated look on his face.

"Are you gonna do something? Because this is when you do something. Are you gonna do something?" His eyes never leave Maya's face as he says this, and I realize that I am really and truly over Lucas Friar.

I raise my head and clear my throat. Both of them turn to look at me. "I'm okay guys. Really. I don't know what that was back there, but I'm fine." I notice the looks on their faces are ones of utter disbelief. Maya opens her mouth and then closes it as if she can't believe the words that just came out of my mouth. She looks at Lucas who looks right back at her.

"Look, Riles," she turns to look at me. "We saw the way you looked at him. You were literally frozen in shock...or jealousy…or both!" Maya sat down next to me and moved my chin up with her hand to get me to look her in the eyes. "You know you can tell me anything, right honey?"

"I…I know, peaches. I just…don't know how I'm feeling right now." I looked down at my hands. On the other side of me, I felt Lucas sit down. My fingers twisted together, always moving. I glanced up briefly to the other side of my room. There's a certain picture of Farkle and I that caught my eye. We were lying on his couch. My head was on his chest. My face is only halfway in the frame, but I remember that I was smiling. So was he. Even though he rarely smiles in pictures anymore. I smiled sadly at the memory.

"Whatcha looking at, Riley?" Lucas asked quietly. I pointed to the picture. I heard the both of them sigh.

"You're gonna be okay, Riles. You're gonna be okay."

* * *

The following day I was sitting in Topanga's with my favorite smoothie, thick so I can eat it with a spoon. My Algebra book tossed open on the table in front of me, pencils and paper on top of that. I couldn't concentrate in the slightest. My mind was whirling with the kiss that I saw yesterday. Realizing that I wasn't going to get any work done, I shoved all of my things into my backpack and stood up. Not looking where I was going, I ran into a lanky person's chest.

"Riles, you gotta watch where you're going," the voice said with a chuckle. I looked up to see none other than Farkle. His eyebrows scrunched up in confusion as he saw the look on my face. "Are you okay?"

I looked around quickly. "Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?" I tried to put on the brightest smile that I could. But even I could tell it seemed fake. I knew that Farkle would see right through it. He _always_ does.

"You know we don't lie to each other, Riley. Why are you lying?" His bright blue eyes peered into my dark brown ones. I opened and closed my mouth like a fish out of water. "Is it about Lucas again?"

"No! I am completely over him, Farkle. He and Maya are dating anyways. They're great together."

"So why the lies? Is it some other guy? Did he hurt you? I'll kill him." His jaw locked as he glared at every other guy in the room as if it could be any of them.

I chuckled slightly. "No, Farkley. No guy hurt me, I promise. I'm just tired. And stressed."

He grabbed the bottom of my chin not unlike Maya did yesterday but instead of keeping it there, we both jumped back as if lightning struck us. My chin was tingly where he touched me and I started stammering.

"I…I'm sorry. I just need to…go. I'm sorry." Before he could say or do anything I ran out of the door to Topanga's, not looking back.


	3. Chapter 3

As I was rushing out of the building, I accidentally ran into Smackle. And when I say ran into I mean, I crashed into her and we both fell to the ground. I saw her square glasses fly off her face and under one of the tables.

"Well shoot," I heard her mutter.

Sighing, I scrambled to my feet and went over to pick up her glasses for her. As she stood up, I handed her glasses to her.

"Here you go, Smackle," I said as I started to turn away from her. She grabbed the glasses and shoved them on her face.

"Is Farkle in there yet?" she asked with a slight edge to her voice. As if she was suspicious that we were doing something in there.

"Yeah, he is." She started to walk towards the door when I stopped her. "Is there a reason you don't like me, Smackle?" She turned to face me with a peculiar look on her face. As if she couldn't believe that I had figured that out. "I'm not as clueless as people think I am, Smackle. I may pretend to be oblivious, but that doesn't mean that I am."

Smackle stared at my face, her eyes bore into mine.

"It is not that I don't like you, Riley. I am just wary around you." With her perfect posture and straight facial expression, she didn't really show any signs of being wary. But I let her continue. "I know it may not seem like it a majority of the time but I am wary of the fact that Farkle has always shown a preference towards you."

"Smackle. You don't have to worry about that. At all." I stepped towards her. "Farkle is with you. He made his decision. You have absolutely nothing to worry about in regards to that. He's my best friend. That's all he'll ever be." My breath hitched as I said the last sentence. Hopefully Smackle didn't catch it.

Seemingly satisfied, Smackle nodded and walked into Topanga's. As I started to walk away, I heard an un Smackle-like giggle through the door. I turned and looked through the glass door, seeing Smackle leaning her head on Farkle's shoulder. Both of them smiling from ear to ear.

I turned to walk away asking myself how long I could keep up this charade.

* * *

As soon as I left Topanga's, I found myself back at home. Honestly, my legs just kinda carried me wherever they wanted to. And evidently they wanted to go home. I walked through the door, threw my backpack on the ground, and collapsed on the couch, face first. I heard shuffling and then footsteps walking my way.

"Riley, honey," I heard my mom say. "Are you alright?" As she sat down on the edge of the couch, she started rubbing my back like she used to do when I was younger. I sat up slowly, not wanting her to stop the back rubbing.

I sighed before I said anything. "I have a problem, mom." The rubbing on my back stopped.

"You need some motherly advice, don't you? I have been waiting for this. Alright. Hit me with it." She did the "come at me" gesture with her arms. My mother is somehow the coolest/lamest person ever at the same time. "No? Okay. I was just trying to get you to smile. It obviously didn't work. What's going on?"

"I like this guy and…he…he's in a relationship. And I didn't realize that I liked him…until it was too late. And now I don't know what to do, mom. I have all of these feelings that I don't know what to do with. I never thought that I would fall for him." I stopped for a minute to catch my breath. My mother reached her hand forward to brush away the tears that I didn't know had fallen.

"It's Farkle. You're falling for Farkle." She said it like a statement, not a question. As if she had known it was going to happen all along.

"How did you know?"

"Mother's intuition. Or the fact that I've noticed the way you look at him. It's the exact same way I looked at your father when I was your age." My mom reached behind her and handed me a tissue. I blew my nose loudly. Honey. I understand what you're feeling-"

"How?" I interrupted. "You've been with dad your whole lives. It's always been you two. How could you possibly know what this feels like?"

My mom shook her head and sighed. "Do you remember your father and me telling you about that girl from the ski lodge?"

"Lauren. Yeah. She almost broke you two apart. But…you never told me how."

"Well, Riley. She and your father kissed." I opened my mouth to respond but she held up a hand. "When he told me that…I remember feeling upset and hurt and betrayed. We broke up shortly after. But I told your father to date her, see how he really felt. He did, and I was just like you are now."

"But you're the one who told him to date her." I said, furrowing my brows in confusion.

"Yes. I did. But…you have to realize I still loved him. It was hard letting him do that. Seeing him with another girl. It about tore me apart on the inside. Which is exactly how you're feeling now, right?"

I felt more tears start streaming down my face. "Yeah. It's how I'm feeling." I sniffled. My mom wrapped her arms around me and pulled me close to her. I sighed deeply, inhaling my mother's earthly scent. "I love you, mommy." I hadn't said that since I was little, but I felt as if I needed to say it.

"I love you too, sweetheart."


	4. Chapter 4

Having falling asleep on the couch, I awoke around 3:30 the next morning. I stood up, stretched and walked to my room. I closed the door and heard a tapping at the bay window. I looked over and saw a soaking wet Farkle outside of my window, his hand held up preparing to knock again. His face was screwed up as if he had been crying. I ran over to the window and opened it. Farkle climbed inside and shut the window as I ran out of my room to grab towels.

I handed him the towels and walked into my closet to grab the extra pajamas that he keeps here for nights like these. And, yes. It has happened quite often. Not as much lately, but when we were younger he used to come over and stay the night at least one night a week.

"What's wrong, Farkle?" I asked quietly as I handed him his pajamas.

"My parents were arguing. Bad arguing again. I couldn't handle it. My mother was throwing things. I needed to leave," he said as he tugged his shirt off.

Whatever words were about to come out of my mouth didn't pass my lips. I stared at Farkle's chest. 'When did he get abs? When did that happen?' I thought. I shook my head and cleared the thought away. Apparently Farkle had changed pants when I was going on my mini rant in my head. Good.

He moved to my bed and nearly collapsed on to it. Gulping, I followed him over and laid down next to him. As soon as I did that, he wrapped his arms around me and buried his face in my hair. 'This is okay, this is normal. We used to do this all the time when we were kids. There's no difference here.' Except there was. He has a girlfriend who is not me and I may or may not be falling in love with him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" I asked, trying to get my mind off of how nice his arms felt around my waist. I twirled around in the bed to face him.

"Maybe in the morning? It is 3:45 and I am kinda tired." Farkle responded. His eyes were closed and his hair was falling over his face.

"Of course we can, Farkley." I refrained from pushing the hair out of his face and closed my eyes, falling asleep almost instantly.

* * *

The next morning I woke up to an arm around my waist and a face pressed into my neck. I shoved Farkle slightly.

"Farkle? Wake up. It's 10." He groaned in response, removing his arm from around me and rolling over. I sat up, looking down at him. I smiled thinking about how cute he looks when he's sleeping. "Farkle. Come on. If you don't wake up, I'll cook you breakfast." He knows that I can't cook, so that made him shoot up in bed.

"I'm awake. I'll cook breakfast, okay? Not you." He stood up, stretching and pattered the way out the door. I rolled my eyes and followed him into the kitchen. Surprisingly, my parents weren't up yet. He walked around my kitchen grabbing a pan, the pancake mix, and other pancake ingredients out of their respective places and set them out on the counter. "Pancakes okay?" he asked, looking back at me.

"Pancakes sound fantastic actually." I said. I sat down in a chair and placed my feet up on the bench. "Thank you, Farkle."

"Of course. Isn't it customary that I do this whenever you let me stay over?" he asked while he put the pan on the stove and turned it on.

"Yeah. Yeah it is. I do have a question though." I twirled my finger around my hair. Farkle turned around to look at me.

"Okay?" he said.

"I was just wondering…why didn't you go to Smackle with this? She is your girlfriend." I wrung my hands underneath the table so that he couldn't see how nervous I was asking this question.

Farkle sighed as he turned around to mix the ingredients together in a bowl. "I guess it's because I've known you longer, Riles. You're my best friend." He stopped mixing the batter and turned around to face me. "Plus I haven't exactly told her about my parents yet." I noticed that his hands were shaking and he was staring at the ground. I stood up and walked in front of him.

Grabbing his shaking hands I said, "It'll be okay, Farkley. She'll understand. She has to."

"Thank you, Riley. Now I think it's my turn to ask you a question." Farkle said with a hint of…flirting?

"I…sure. Go ahead."

"Why did you run out of Topanga's yesterday afternoon?" The smile dropped from my face. I let go of Farkle's hands and backed away. He got a look of concern on his face. "Riley?"

"I just wasn't feeling well-"

"Riley. I know you better than anyone else on this planet. Do you not think I can tell when you're lying to me? You're my best friend, and I know that I'm yours. We tell each other everything." He looked extremely hurt.

"Farkle I-"

"Farkle! I see you stayed the night last night. How are…" My mother trailed off as she saw the way we were looking at each other. Farkle with tears in his eyes, me with tears rolling down my face. "What happened?"

Neither of us could answer her though. We just kept staring at each other.

"Why won't you tell me, Riley?" Farkle said, his voice breaking. My heart breaking when I hear it.

I looked away from him, looking instead out the window. I opened my mouth and then closed it again. "I like you, Farkle." I turned to look at him.

He stared at me. "What?"

"I like you, Farkle. I like you the way Maya likes Lucas. I like you the way Smackle likes you. I have had feelings for you," I stepped closer to him, "for months. I just haven't told you because you've been with Smackle and you seem really happy with her. I just wanted you to be happy."

Farkle leaned back against the counter and looked at the ground. I heard my mom shift her weight a few feet away.

"You know what? I'm just gonna go. I have to talk to your father about something." She turned as fast as she could and walked back into the hallway.

"Farkle, please say something. Please."

* * *

 **I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who reads my story. Writing is something that I've always loved to do. Thank you to everyone who comments. If any if y'all have any requests for a one-shot or something, I'll try and do it. If y'all have criticism for me, I'd love to hear it. It helps me become a better writer. Thank you guys again! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Farkle didn't look up at me. He didn't say anything. He just stood there staring at the ground. I stared at him, tears running down my face.

"I…I think I need to go," He said as he started moving towards my bedroom. I saw him disappear and then reappear a few second later with his shoes on. He moved to the door not saying anything. I didn't look back as he left.

I gripped the edge of the table hard, bowing my head I started to sob. In my head I started thinking, 'I screwed up. I screwed up. I screwed up.' I slid to the ground, curling into a ball, and staring off blankly.

My parents walked in, obviously having heard everything. They didn't say anything but look at each other. Dad came over and picked me up in his arms like he used to do when I was younger and had fallen asleep on the couch. He carried me to my bedroom and laid me down on my bed, pulling the covers over me and kissing me on the forehead.

"I love you, Riley," he said. "And I'm gonna go kill that boy for reacting like that. Damn Minkus. Always knew they weren't good…" He started rambling on about how the Minkus' have always been this way, even when they were younger, pacing around my room as he did so.

"Dad," I said, my voice coming out hoarse, "please just stop. He's still my best friend. And Mr. Minkus isn't a bad person." I sighed. "They're good people."

He stopped his pacing and sat at the edge of my bed. "I know, sweetheart. But he hurt you. He hurt my little girl."

My mom sat down right next to him. "As much as I hate to agree with your father," He looked exasperated at that, "he's right. Well, maybe not to the extent that he's going. But... that did hurt you, right?"

I nodded.

"Maybe you should just…stay away from Farkle for a while, yeah?" My mom ran her fingers through my hair. "We'll leave you alone, right honey?" She looked at my dad expectantly. He glared back at her.

"Of course honey." He said with slight sarcasm. "We love you, Riley."

They both walked out of my room, and as the door closed I heard one of the windows in my room open. Maya, Zay, and Lucas crawled through one at a time and stood at the edge of my bed. Maya sighed and laid down next to me.

"How did you guys know…?"

Maya looked over at me. "We're your best friends. You honestly believe that we wouldn't know if something was wrong?"

"My mom told you didn't she?"

"She absolutely did."

I rolled my eyes and looked away from everybody else. Without meaning to, my eyes started watering again. "I told Farkle today." I said.

Maya sat up, and I looked over and saw the three of them exchange glances.

"It didn't go very well. He…he didn't say anything. He just kinda stood there, looking at the ground. And then he said that he had to go. I don't know what to do." I finished my mini rant and sat up in my bed, shoving my face in my hands. "What if he never wants to speak to me again? What if I screwed everything up?" I felt Maya start to rub my back.

"Well if it makes you feel any better, I fell on my butt today. In front of everyone. It was bad, Riles." Zay said. "I was just about as clumsy as you!"

I looked over and glared at him. He physically took a step back and raised his hands in the air in the sign of 'I surrender.'

"Yeah, okay."

Sighing, I stood up and walked over to the bulletin board above my desk. It had pictures upon pictures of Maya, Farkle, Lucas, Zay, and countless others on it. I stared at it for a good half a minute before starting to take down all of the pictures with Farkle in them.

"Honey. Whatcha doing?" I head Maya ask from behind me.

As soon as all the pictures of him were down, I shoved them in a drawer in my desk and turned around. "I think I just need a bit of a Farkle detox." I breathed out. I breathed in. "My mom told me it may be best to stay away from him for a while. So I'm doing that." I moved around my bed to my bedside table to turn a picture of Farkle and me upside down.

Lucas watched me curiously. "I don't think she meant for you to take down all of the pictures of him-"

"I did!" I heard my mother yell from the other room. I looked at Lucas pointedly then continued to glance around the room, looking for more pictures of Farkle. I froze in my tracks when I saw Hazel the Hippo. I had forgotten I'd put her on top of my dresser. I walked over to her and picked her up.

'I know that I told you I've loved you since the first grade, but I don't think I've ever told you why.'

'Why didn't I see it before?' I asked myself. I turned around to face 3 of my best friends. I walked past them into my closet and put Hazel the Hippo up on the top shelf.

* * *

I walked into school that next Monday late. Like, extremely late. Which is unlike me. I overslept and didn't get out of the house until the bell was supposed to ring for the start of class. I looked in the mirror before leaving. I looked like a mess. My hair was hastily brushed, my clothes were all out of whack. I didn't even have time to put in my contacts, so I was wearing my clunky glasses. I looked horrible, but I didn't have time to fix it.

When I got to school I burst into my father's classroom. He looked up at me in confusion.

"Riley, where have you been? Oh my god you look horrible," he said. I saw everyone turn back to look at me. I ignored my dad and the stares of everyone and sat down in my set. Which was right next to Farkle. Just my luck. "Riley, are you-"

"I'm fine dad. Seriously. I'm sorry I'm late. Can we please get on with whatever we're talking about?" I interrupted. He gave me this 'I can't believe you just told me what to do look' and turned back to the blackboard.

"Wait a minute." I turned around to look at Lucas. "When did you start wearing glasses?" He looked extremely confused.

Zay raised his hand slightly. "I was wondering about that too…"

I sighed and rubbed my hand across my face. "I haven't worn them in years. I just didn't have time to put my contacts in this morning." I looked around the classroom at literally anyone or anything but Farkle or Smackle, my eyes finally settling on my dad again. His face softened when he looked at me.

"Riley, go outside."

"But I'm-"

"Outside." He pointed to the door. I glared at him for a brief moment before turning and accidentally locking eyes with Farkle. My insides felt like they turned to goop.

"Riley-" Farkle reached his hand out to grab my arm, but I walked away before he could. I know that people say that you shouldn't run away from your problems, but this was different. It had to be.

My dad followed me outside of the classroom and closed the door behind him. "Are you sure you're okay?" He put his hands on my shoulders. "Because that didn't seem like okay."

I nodded in response. "I'm okay. Really."

He looked at me long and hard. "You know I don't believe you, right?"

I nodded again.

"Go take some time, Riley. Take 10 minutes or so and when you're ready, we'll be in there." He kissed me on the top of the head and walked back into the classroom.

* * *

I was the last one out of class. It seemed fitting since I was the last person into class this morning. Everyone else sped out of class like the speed of light except for my father and Farkle. I looked up briefly to see Farkle staring at me from across the row. I looked at my dad with a panicked expression on my face.

Seeing it, my dad said, "Farkle. Can you give us a few minutes?"

Farkle stared at me a few seconds longer, then took an extra-long time to get up, and walked out of the door, his eyes not once leaving my face.

"Thank you, dad-"

He cut me off mid-sentence. "It's not going to happen again, Riley. You need to sort out whatever this is with Farkle."

"But you said-"

"I know what I said the other day. But…he seems just as miserable as you are, Riley. Don't keep doing this to each other. It's killing you both not talking to the other." He knelt down in front of my desk and stared at me straight in the eye. "Do you remember when we talked about the Trojan horse and I said to look more deeply, never assume?"

"Of course I do…" I responded back.

"Do that here. Don't automatically assume something. Don't automatically assume he's all fine and dandy, Riley. He hurts when you hurt. Anyone can see that. Now go to the rest of your classes." He stood up and held his arms out for me to give him a hug. I stood and hugged him.

"Thank you, dad." I picked up my backpack and walked into the hallway where Maya was waiting over by our lockers. I opened mine and started shoving my history things into it.

"You okay, honey?" Maya asked curiously.

I turned towards her. "Yeah, I'll be fine." I looked over her shoulder to see Smackle trying to get Farkle's attention. He was just staring off into space. I saw him shake his head and smile weakly at his girlfriend. She tried to lean up and kiss him but he turned his head so that she got his cheek. Smackle and I both looked confused as he walked away from her.

Farkle raised his head to look directly at me, and I froze. He looked just as miserable as I did. Shaking his head, he continued to walk past me and into the next hallway over. I looked back over at Smackle and she was staring at me with a look so heated if looks could kill, I'd be dead. I opened my mouth to say something, but she slammed her locker door and walked off.

"Well," Maya started, "that was interesting."


	6. Chapter 6

After school, Maya and I were on the subway going back to my house. My head was resting against the cold metal pole, and Maya was people watching on the subway car.

I turned to look at her and said, "I think I need to go visit Uncle Josh. He'll know what to do."

Maya just nodded. She realized that her feelings for Josh was just a crush. They've actually had long talks about it, and I think he helped her work through those feelings so that she could be with Lucas.

She stood up next to me. "Do you want me to go with you, honey?" She asked, her voice soft.

I shook my head. "No. I need to talk to him by myself." I breathed out heavily. The subway stopped and the doors opened. An onslaught of people entered the subway and pushed both Maya and I out of the way. We both fell back on the seat and I rested my head on her shoulder.

The subway pulled up to the stop nearest New York University. I stood up and looked behind me before getting off. "You'll be okay by yourself, Peaches?" I asked.

She smiled warmly at me. "I always am. Go." She shooed me off.

I walked off the subway and continued to walk until I got to NYU. I walked by dozens of college students who glanced at me, wondering why I was here. Some people ran into me, others quickly tried to not run me completely over.

I finally arrived at Josh's dorm room and I knocked on the door. Josh's roommate, Micha, answered.

"Hey, Riley! How you doing?" His thick glasses almost falling off of his face. He was a nice guy. "You here for Josh? Of course you are, why did I even ask. Come on in!" He widened the door so that I could walk in behind him.

I walked into their dimly lit dorm room to not see my uncle. I looked all around the tiny space, but still nothing.

"Hey, Micha? Where's Josh?" I asked.

Right after I said that, the doorknob jiggled and in walked Josh. His brown hair was pushed up in a beanie (like always) and he was dressed like a hipster. Because that's what he is (although he'd never admit it.) He looked at me curiously.

"Hey, M. Do you mind giving us a few minutes?" He asked Micha. Micha just nodded and left the room, closing the door in the process.

"What's wrong?" He crossed his arms over his chest. "I know you wouldn't be coming here unless something was wrong." He sat down on his bed and patted next to him, a gesture for me to sit down as well. I did.

I sighed. "I have feelings for Farkle-"

"Dr. Turtleneck?" Josh interrupted.

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah. Dr. Turtleneck. Although he doesn't wear them much anymore. He's sticking to darker clothes now. Anyways. I told him I liked him and he ran away. And I don't know what to do, Joshy." I felt tears start coming down my face. Josh wrapped an arm around me and he pulled me to his chest. "I don't know what to do."

I felt Josh nodding from above me. He was obviously thinking of what to say. "Well, niece, I don't really think I can tell you what to do other than that you need to talk to him."

I shot up from his chest and glared at him. "You've been talking to my dad, haven't you?"

He looked around. "Whaaatttt? Me?" Josh said sarcastically. I just shook my head. "Look, Riley. Your dad, my brother, knows what's up. He knows what he's talking about. Listen to him."

"You sound just like him," I mumbled and crossed my arms.

"Yeah, well." He shrugged. "How about we go get some ice cream? It'll help take your mind off of it."

"I'd like that Uncle Joshy."

I walked into my room a short time later to see Farkle laying in the bay window. He hadn't noticed me come in yet so he still looked extremely relaxed. He was laying down, staring at the ceiling with his eyes closed. I tiptoed forward so he wouldn't hear me. I glanced down and noticed the way his lips parted just so and his hair fell over his eyes. I cleared my throat and he jerked upwards.

"Hey, Riles." He ran one hand through his hair awkwardly. I sat down next to him and placed my hands in my lap.

"Hey." I responded back. Neither of us were looking at each other. "Why are you here?" I asked. I turned my head to stare at him.

He looked at me, grimaced, and then looked away again. "I just felt like...we ended badly. I shouldn't have run away from the situation. I was just...confused, I guess." He rubbed his face with his hands and finally looked me in the eye. "But even then, I shouldn't have just run out. I'm sorry, Riley."

I was speechless. He hardly ever apologizes. He only does when he knows how badly he's screwed up. He had the same look on his face as he did when I called him out on our first day of high school. He looked ashamed. I hated that look on his face.

"No, Farkle. It's okay. Really. I shouldn't have told you. I should have known that it would have caused...this." I said while gesturing between us. I paused. "Does Smackle know?"

Farkle shook his head. "No. She doesn't...All she knows is I've been worried about you a lot more than I normally am." He chuckled nervously. That made me feel even worse.

I started to have a mini freak out. 'Is she mad at me for this? Is she mad at Farkle? I can't be responsible if something bad happens between them. Oh god.' I put a hand on my chest to try and control my heartrate. I started breathing heavy and I started to see black spots in my vision. I heard Farkle's voice from what sounded like miles away.

"Riley?!" I felt an arm wrap around my waist as I pitched forward.

And then everything went black.


	7. Chapter 7

I woke up to see my parents and Farkle standing over me. Well, my parents were standing over me. I was in Farkle's lap so his head was the only thing dangling over me.

"Thank God you're okay," I heard my dad say.

"What happened…?" I asked groggily.

"You passed out, Riley." I turned to look at my mom. "You've been out for about 20 minutes."

I stood up abruptly and held my hand to my forehead when I started to feel dizzy. Both my parents and Farkle reached out to steady me. I pulled back from all three of them.

"I'm okay guys. Really."

. "Riles you're not-"

"I'm fine." I interrupted. "Please just everybody leave." I walked over to the head of my bed and sat down, my back against the headboard. "I just want to be left alone." I pulled my knees up to my chest and closed my eyes. I heard my parents muttering to each other, then footsteps, and then I heard my door close.

I opened my eyes to still see Farkle standing in the same place he was before.

I sighed and rubbed my face with my hands. "What are you still doing here, Farkle?"

He moved over to the side of my bed and sat down.

"I'm worried about you, Riles." He tried to take my hand but I snatched it away. I looked up to see a hurt expression briefly cross his face. "Riley I...I understand why you don't want me here but-"

"Please Farkle," I paused to look at him, really look at him. To get him to understand. "It's not that I don't want to see you, it's that I just want to be left alone. Please. Please."

He nodded but the pain on his face was clear - he didn't believe me.

"I'll leave you be, Riley. Really. But can you at least tell me one thing?" His voice was shaky as he asked.

"Sure," I responded, my voice hoarse.

"Why are all of the pictures of me gone?" I looked down at my lap, too embarrassed to answer. "Did you think I wouldn't notice?" His voice became hoarse like mine. He wasn't angry, he was just sad.

"I'm sorry, Farkle. I'm sorry."

I heard a sniffle and felt the weight on my bed leave. I glanced up to see Farkle staring at me with tears silently falling down his face.

"Me too."

* * *

We haven't talked in weeks, Farkle and I. He's spent all of his free time with Smackle and I've spent all of my free time trying not to fall apart.

I was sitting at Topanga's with Maya and Zay, they were both trying to cheer me up, when Smackle ran in looking devastated. She sat down on the ottoman next to Zay and stared at the coffee table, unblinking.

"Uhh, Izzy. Are you okay?" asked Zay.

She looked up, startled, at the sound of his voice. She wiped her eyes, straightened her skirt and looked at all of us.

"I would like to speak to Isaiah alone please," Smackle said, her voice only wavering slightly from her usual tone.

Maya and I glanced at each other. "Okay, that's fine. If you need anything, let us know," Maya said.

We walked out of Topanga's, glancing back occasionally. We made it outside and paused by one of the tables.

"What do you think that was about?" Maya asked.

"I don't know, Maya. Smackle seemed really upset. Like, more upset than I've ever seen her."

"You don't think…?" Maya trailed off.

I stared at her questioningly as Maya stared through the glass door at Zay and Smackle. "What?" I asked.

She turned back towards me. "You don't think her and Farkle broke up, do you?"

I froze. "I...I don't know. It would make sense but...I hope not. For Farkle's sake. He was, is, happy with her." I trailed off.

We both looked up as we heard the door open. Zay walked out with a weary expression on his face. He put his hands behind his head, linked his fingers together and let out a long, exasperated sigh.

"I probably shouldn't tell y'all this, but Farkle and Smackle broke up. It just happened."

Maya didn't looked shocked. "Who broke up with who?" she asked.

"Surprisingly, it was Izzy that broke it off. She…" Zay looked over at me briefly "she saw how upsetting it was for Farkle to not talk to or be near Riley. She couldn't handle it anymore. So she broke up with him." He broke off and turned around when Smackle tapped on the door behind him.

"Will you walk me home, Isaiah?" Smackle asked in a quiet voice.

"Of course." He offered her his arm. "M'lady." Smackle giggled slightly. "And that was the goal. Adios Maya and Riley."

"Bye Zay," Maya and I said in unison. We watched the pair walk up the stairs and out of sight before we started talking.

"What are you going to do, Riles?" Maya asked me.

I turned to face her. "Nothing. I can't. It wouldn't be fair to Smackle, Farkle, or me if I did do anything. Besides Farkle probably doesn't want to do anything with me anyways." I muttered, halfway to myself.

Maya snorted.

"What?" I snapped.

"Nothing, Riles. Nothing." Maya turned her head, but I caught a glimpse of her smile before she did so. "You need to talk to him though. Soon. It's obviously killing you both."

"I know I do, Peaches. I just don't know how." I sounded whiny, even to myself.

"Just like you have for the past 9 years, Riley. You don't have to do anything different." She stood in front of me to make me look her in the eye. "You're Riley and Farkle. You two can get through anything. And if you can't get through this...there's no hope for the rest of us."


End file.
